Today a friend articulated for me a thought that I have never really been able to put into words before. She said to me that I needed to put my energy into finding for myself some moments of pure joy, not where I like the picture of myself doing something, but where I am actually absorbed in being happy doing what I are doing in the moment...
And I know exactly what she is talking about... too often I do things not because I am drawn to how they actually make me feel, but because I like the idea of me doing them...
Perhaps the moments of actual happiness are hard to find because they cannot be constructed from the outside, they can only be experienced from within and then replicated.
So I will take time over the next weeks to notice the moments when I am simply happy - not acting out an idea of happiness.
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