So its week 11 of my 12 week weight loss challenge. I feel both proud and disappointed. I have lost an incredible 8kg... which feels so wonderful and I am so incredibly pleased with myself. I put on clothes, and they fit. I dress once, without having to change 4 times to find something that doesn't make me feel enormous. I look in the mirror and I like what I see...
At the same time I am also disappointed that I have stalled. My challenge is now to move to the next level of loss, out of my current wardrobe and into the small clothes I have packed away. Its been too easy to rest on my laurels now. I have lost focus and I want it back.
I have two weeks of this 12 week round to go and I recommit myself to getting and staying on track. I then maintain myself for a few weeks, and will start a second 12 week program at the end of May. My overall goal is to lose 15kg... which will see me under 60 kg for the first time since my early 20's.
Its a hugely challenging goal and one that I already find myself doubting my capacity to achieve. It will require an incredible amount of physical effort, but more than that is the mental work involved. My mental image of myself is about where I am now. I let go of the hope of ever being smaller than this again, and I am not really sure how I will get my head around it or what it will mean for me.
One thing I am sure of, having learnt it from experience... it will be achieved through consistency, with humility and not thinking I know better than the program, and by focusing on one kilo at a time.
One step at a time, up the slippery slope...
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