9.8

So 9.8 was tonight's glucose reading....
After a day of gorgeously normal readings - all under my prescribed upper limit of 6.5... tonight my glucose level jumped to 9.8.
If I get readings over 6.5 more than 5 times a week then I double the medication I am on.
If I still get readings of over 6.5 more than 5 times a week then I start injecting myself with insulin before every meal.
Its an incredible sense of lack of control over my own body. I am doing my utmost to manage my diet... I am eating the best possible foods I can think of.... no sugar, no fats, low GI....
And still I tested 9.8 tonight.
Today I saw a specialist who broke the cheerful news that no matter what I do my hormones will continue to rise, and thus my diabetes will continue to get worse.... I can try to slow the process with diet and exercise, but sooner or later I will have to start insulin injections.
So today I stuck a needle in my belly and injected myself with 1mg as a test run. Its not an easy thing to do... the specialist told me I was very strong and did a great job. In reality, I just left my body for a moment and went into shut down autopilot mode.
I know its not that uncommon. I know there are lots of people who live with it everyday. I know there are lots of people who have it a lot worse than I do...
I am thankful for my blessings - but it also sucks.
Wadda ya do though....
You keep on keeping on...