So I have realised recently how profoundly I am influenced by others expectations of me. I feel acutely the judgements of others when I don't meet their expectations. Some people affect me more profoundly than others... and over-all the result is an overwhelming urge to flee, and the almost complete loss of a stable sense of who I am - and that its ok to be me!I am not like other people... I do things differently to other people... I know that some things about me are sometimes frustrating, confusing or concerning to others - but I happen to, when I am outside of the influence of others judgements, like myself the way I am.
So I have visualised for myself a Silver Space... it is my space... space to be myself free of others judgements. In my silver space I don't feel guilty, I don't feel inadequate... With love I allow others to be who they are and be different to me... and I don't need to take on any pressure to be like them or to feel bound by their expectations.
In my Silver Space I am free.
1 comment:
In those times when I can maintain some sort of emotional intelligence, I check in with myself when some one tells me I've failed to meet their expectations. I ask do I feel a sense of failure, do I feel that I have let myself down? If the answer to these questions is a genuine 'No' then I am reassured that I am being projected upon ...... that the deck was stacked by the inner shenanigans of another, presumably unconscious to their process.
On other occasions I ponder whether the person passing judgement upon me is merely a messenger. Required by my higher self to burrow through the daily interference......
Either way I love the idea of a 'Silver Room' :-)
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